Fuck my life.

I'm about to freak the fuck out.  Nobody knows how to keep a secret apparently.  I was talking to a friend of mine, and the subject of pregnancy and miscarriages came up.  In confidence, I told her my brothers ex-girlfriend accidentally got pregnant and miscarried.  I explicitly told her not to tell anyone at all, as my brother told me to keep it very secret.  This is a friend I trust very much, or did until now.  She told her boyfriend (who cheated on her), and he told my brothers current girlfriend.  Except he got it wrong, and thought my brothers current girlfriend miscarried, which is definitely not true.  Because she's a virgin, and now she's super confused and kind of hurt.  Not to mention she never wants to come over again because she doesnt want to see me, because she thinks I'm coming up with rumors about her.  Which I'm not!  And my brothers mad at me, and therefore I'm angry at my friend.

And it turns out one of my best friends, or so I thought, talks about me all the time.  She called me fat..  I dont care about anything except tht.  Well I do, but tht hurts more than anything.  And she's a good 10 lbs heavier than me, so what the hell.  She lies about EVERYTHING, even things tht wouldnt even matter.  She told her ex-best friend (whom I'm very close with, but she switched schools) I hate her, and tht she hates me.  It was a bunch of bullshit, everything she says is bullshit.  She yells at me for smoking, yet she gets drunk and high all the time, never comes to school, and never does any work.  I cant trust anyone, everyone lies to me and betrays me.

I'll post about eating and such later.. I just want to crawl into a hole and die.  Nobody is there for me anymore, I feel so stranded and alone.